drunkdilf:

fasterfood:

*teacher voice* tonight’s homework is to get laid

*fails class*

The lack of tattoos on my body is highly upsetting.

(Source: jabberwockysuperfly)

swiggityswee:

THE WORST THING IN THE WORLD IS WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS U CHIPS AND U REACH IN THE BAG BUT U CAN’T GET A HOLD OF A CHIP AND U START SWEATIN’ AND PEOPLE ARE STARING CUZ U CAN’T GET HOLD OF A GODDAMN CHIP AND THEN CHILDREN ARE SCREAMING AND U HEAR GUNSHOTS AND BUILDINGS START COLLAPSING BUT U STILL. CAN’T. GET. A. CHIP.

(Source: moderatelybadbitch)

i honestly don’t remember doing that
me about 85% of the things i’ve done (via jaclcfrost)
  • me: damn i need to save my money
  • me: *spends $200 in a week*